Fucking Ouch, Dude

My favorite aunt always tells me that "it only takes a day." It only take a day for your life to change. One person. One incident. One phone call. All it takes is one day. And she's right I mean, it does in fact, only take one day to meet someone and fall in love or to get the job offering of a lifetime, have a child etc. But on the flip side to that, sometimes it only takes a minute, a split second for your life to change in a negative, heart wrenching, inexplicably upsetting, mind numbing manner. And when that happens, you wish it took longer.

I'm not going to say much more than that, because I'm still processing that moment. And even though I could say so much more, I'm still trying to figure it out and stop blaming myself for not having seen it coming. I'm trying to get through the hurt. For as much learning and growing and observation as I've done in the past 15 or so months, I expect more from myself and maybe that's why this moment hurts so much more. Because I let myself down and sometimes that is far worse than being let down by someone else, even if it is by someone you never expected would, or at least hoped would not....



But did.